I’m gonna be honest with you, it doesn’t take a whole lot of anything to get the attention of a dick.

Ryan “Easily Excited” Haywood, to Meg “Spend My Mornings Calling For Dick” Turney (Free Play: Grimm Eclipse Shootout! – #59)


Jeremy, for his high school graduation, decorated his cap with a bunch of like party poppers and attached them all to strings

when he went up to get his diploma he grabbed the yarn hanging from his hat

and his vice principal, giving him the diploma, just said

“what are you about to do.”

and he pulled the yarn and all the poppers just exploded and launched like confetti and shit off his head.

he said he always goes to his graduation events to try and do something fun and silly at them


i dunno, guys, i just like to think about how the average criminal in los santos reacts to the fake ah crew

like because of course there’s the option where everybody’s terrified of ramsey’s crew and the the wreckage they wreak and the power they have, but there’s ALSO the equally excellent and probable option where the average criminal’s reaction to the fake ah crew is something generally along the lines of “oh great it’s THESE assholes again”

because when you come down to it the fahc is a big group of bored idiots with time and money and that lends itself to some irritating happenstances and the poor delinquents of los santos are just trying to make a dishonest living

“the fake ah crew cleared out the ammu-nation and now i can’t finish off this paid assassination.”

“the fake ah crew demolished the whole shopping district with flare guns and i can’t rob this store without a balaclava.”

“the fake ah crew keeps failing to rob the bank i’m trying to rob and now there’s always cops there.”

the fake ah crew bought all the dildos at this shop for another elaborate prank and now i can’t get off.”


I really love the idea that sometimes Jeremy is the voice of reason like 

“Gavin you cannot steal koalas from the zoo. No. I don’t care how cute they are, Gavin. They’re mean and we do not have the ability to care for exotic animals in the penthouse. What do you mean, you thought I would be into the idea? What the fuck.”

but then other times, he’s like 

“Hey. What would happen if, hypothetically, someone were to borrow Ryan’s car–yeah, the nice one, duh–and maybe, perhaps, use it to transport a lot of birds? What? Yeah, birds. Like parrots and shit. Which, I mean, speaking of shit…”


I love the idea of kids and animals fully trusting the Vagabond, even when he’s masked up and toting a gun.

During a bank robbery, one little boy stopped to yell out that the Vagabond just looked so cool, and can he dress up like that, please, mom? Ryan laughed about it later (the crew got tired of hearing about it), and still keeps an eye out on Halloween for any kids who’d had the same idea.

Once, pre-heist, Ryan had been waiting for the signal out of sight of their target, and was approached by a young girl who’d gotten lost. Ryan put away his gun, got up, and got her to safety and to somewhere that could help. (The store clerk was surprised and terrified when the masked mass murder walked in, and then seemed extremely confused when he was told to help this little girl get ahold of someone who could find her mom). Ryan came back to the heist late, but managed a spectacular entrance to make up for it.

Kids have stopped to talk or ask questions, and one little kid wanted to show Ryan the toy they were carrying around that day. Even without the mask, most parents take one look at Ryan and usher their kids away, but the kids seem thrilled to be talking to him. He gets a lot of cheerful goodbyes as the kids are dragged away by their parents.

On the way to a meeting, he and Gavin came across a stray dog. Gavin tried to coax the dog closer, inching toward it and trying to pet it. The dog growled and backed away, so Ryan offered to try. He reached into his pocket (Gavin shouted at him not to shoot the dog, Christ Ryan what are you doing?) and pulled out a bag of dog treats. After crouching down and offering one to the dog, it didn’t take long for the dog to stop growling and come over so Ryan could pet it and make sure it was okay. Gavin grumbled about it for ages afterward.